


I love you/I hate you - Dreams upon a starless sky

by OneAutumnLeaf



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Character Death, F/M, Falling In Love, Soulmates, Visions in dreams
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-27
Updated: 2018-04-27
Packaged: 2019-04-28 13:04:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14449857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneAutumnLeaf/pseuds/OneAutumnLeaf
Summary: You thought nothing bad would happen when you awoke this morning.Wrong. Really wrong.





	I love you/I hate you - Dreams upon a starless sky

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language so I hope I didn't make too many mistakes with my grammar and spelling.  
> At least I tried. Bear with me.  
> If you find anything, please don't be shy and point it out to me so I can fix it. 
> 
> Enjoy ;)  
> ___________________________________________________________________________

When you woke up this morning you didn’t think that anything bad would happen. You thought it would be just a normal day.  
Unknowing you started your day as usual. A loud knock sounded from the door. “My Lady your parents await you in 30 minutes for breakfast.”  
You heard a butler call you. “I’m already on my way. “ you called back and heard his steps walking further down the hallway of the mansion you were living in.  
Probably to wake up your brother.

Getting up in the morning never was a problem for you. You were used to getting up early for the day, considering you never slept much anyway. A lot of times nightmares plagued you but as soon as you got used to them it wasn’t a problem anymore. You looked healthy again. In the beginning however they drained your energy way too much to be just normal nightmares. Sometimes you awoke with scratches, sometimes with bruises. You got skinnier and skinnier and dark bags made themselves visible under your eyes. Your parents sent for a doctor to check out your problems and cure them. It pained them to see you so exhausted.  
They tried everything. Sleeping pills, talking with psychologists, even dream catchers and charms to help you. It worked in the beginning, however your nightmares came back after a while so you didn’t have another choice other than just accept them and get used to them. Your dreams still terrified you but you started to learn not to let them get to you emotionally so easily anymore.

After a few minutes of stretching your sore muscles you got up, standing on your still a bit wobbly feet. Quickly you made your way to the bathroom, deciding to start your morning routine with a nice long shower. Slowly you dressed out of your white nightgown, folding it properly again and putting it to the side. After you adjusted the temperature of the water you stepped inside, sighing happily. You enjoyed the feeling of the water on your skin, it was relaxing not only your muscles but also your mind. While rubbing your favorite shower gel on your skin and washing your hair with shampoo as well as conditioner, you thought back on the dream you had in the night. Since years it was the first one that wasn’t a nightmare, at least not entirely. A smile placed itself on your lips and you noticed your cheeks heating up. You were blushing.

 

**///**

 

You awoke on a field. At first light blinded you but once your eyes adjusted you could make out the scenery that surrounded you. It looked like a beautiful ocean with the blue flowers swaying slightly in the wind. The sun was shining down on you and you could feel a light breeze caressing your skin. Birds were chirping in the distance.

 

A beautiful flowing white dress graced your body, feeling like the finest silk. Gently you traced your fingers along the material wondering if it could also be a wedding dress. It was simple in design, hugging your figure just right. A small smile of wonder and a happy sigh of content later you looked up to the cloudless sky. Watching birds flying in a dance across the blue sea above you. You wondered about them. Free to go and do as they please. What if you could just fly away? What would it feel like to be completely free? Shaking the thought out of your head with a laugh you laid back in the grass. You could feel the warmness of the sun caressing your skin, deciding that you didn’t want this dream to end. But still you wondered. ‘Where am I? Did I die and go to heaven?’ A place so beautiful, you couldn’t believe that a place such as this existed in the world.

 

After a few minutes you noticed a dog in front of you. It looked at you like it was expecting you to get up and follow it, the tail wiggling in excitement as you finally stood up. Even though your were confused you did follow the canine in front of you across the field. The dog itself was rather small, fur fluffed up and white from the color. The blue eyes seemed to stare you right in your soul, but not in a threatening way. It did spread a feeling of safety through your body.

 

The grass felt soft under your bare feet. You were sure you never saw something so vividly green and feeling something so soft. The ground itself wasn’t hard either, but also not too soft to let you sink in uncomfortably with every step you made. Your mind wandered off again. Taking in your surroundings and thinking about where you were. So instead of following like you decided to do before, you walked around aimlessly. After a few minutes of exploring on your own you remembered what you actually wanted to do. The dog however was already out of sight.

 

You couldn’t see the dog anymore so you set on following the barks it made once in a while, leading you to a forest. Tall trees were towering before you. No path was leading into it and you wondered if there even was one. You pondered over entering it or not. Your brows furrowed and a thoughtful scowl grazed your beautiful face. What if you got lost? Are there any monsters inside? For a second you were sure you heard a growl. You nearly reached the point of just turning around and walking back to the place you woke up. Still you felt drawn to it. Something in there wanted you to come, like it was calling you with a soft soothing voice.

 

Once you heard the barking again you stepped forward into it. The trees stood closely to one another, there wasn’t a path to follow and the leaves and branches so dense it left no sunlight past them. Darkness engulfed you, leaving you practically blind at the moment. Distant growls scared you and once you heard a twig snap a few feet behind, you started to sprint. You started to sweat, not because of exhaustion and movement of your body, but because of the sheer terror you felt at the moment. I clouded your vision as some of it reached your eyes. Considering the lack of sunlight you didn’t even bother to rub your eyes free of it. You couldn’t see anything properly anyway. Your breathing formed into exhausted panting, and your legs felt like they were on fire. Being barefoot didn’t protect your feet from the sharp twigs and roots on the ground. You let out a scream as you noticed that whatever it was that was chasing you got closer. You felt its breath and you barely escaped its claws as they tried to get you. You felt like you were running for hours, hurt, exhausted and terrified to no end until you finally saw the exit of the forest. But just as you thought you were safe, you crashed to the ground, feeling a heavy weight upon you before you passed out.

 

After you awoke again you were at a lake. It was already night outside and the lake in front of you reflected the moon and stars above you. It looked much like the place you were before, the same flowers growing here as well. You instantly turned around after you sat up. Looking over your surroundings expecting that something will jump on you again but you saw nothing. Nothing except from the silence and calmness of the night. The warmness was gone, replaced by chill winds. You curled yourself more together at an attempt to warm yourself. But it didn’t seem to work that well, considering that you couldn’t stop shivering.

 

Goosebumps still present on your usually soft skin. You didn’t know for how long you sat there like this, wanting to go home, until you finally heard a voice. “I finally found you my love. Are you alright? You could have been hurt.” A soft but deep voice called from behind you. A shiver went down your spine and you let out a small scream of surprise. You didn’t dare to move, scared of what will happen next. Just now you noticed the scratches on your bare feet, feeling dried tears on your cheeks. You saw a trail of blood on your left leg, messing up the innocent white of your dress with a dark red. Your eyes widened, but you forced yourself to calm down. “I…I won’t hurt you, please don’t be scared anymore. I’m here.” Soothing. That’s something you could describe the male voice behind you with. As soon as you got calmer and noticed that no threat came from whoever it was standing behind you, you tried to stand up to turn around, as soon as you did, you stumbled and felt lightheaded. You felt strong arms wrap around you in a loving hug, catching you from your fall and a warm breath tickling the skin on your neck. You felt the man nuzzling your neck, feeling the desperate smile on his face.

 

“I’m sorry my dear, it’s all my fault. I shouldn’t have…” “It’s alright. Don’t worry about it anymore, I just want to go home.” The words just left your mouth on instinct. “I love you.” You felt him stiffen a bit at those words before him letting out a quiet shaky laugh. “I love you too.” His grip loosened a bit as not to crush you accidently. Taking in a deep breath you relaxed against his arms, sliding down with him back to the grass covered ground. The scent of flowers making you feel at home. You leaned back into his arms, feeling him leaving butterfly kisses along your neck and shoulders. A silent apology for whatever he has done. “ I will bring you home, just sleep my sweet princess.” With a smile you closed your eyes as he scooped you up into his arms and as soon as you drifted off to sleep you awoke in your own bed.

 

///

  

With a sigh you stepped out of the shower. You wondered what that dream meant. It was different than your usual dreams but it felt just as real. This time however it felt way too real. You were sure to still feel the sun on your skin and smell the flowers. You made yourself a note mentally to research the meaning of dreams. Maybe you could find something. You wanted to stay longer but you knew that your family was waiting. Now as the warm water wasn’t running over your skin anymore you felt cold. Quickly you dried yourself and began to brush your teeth. Your hair however felt like a mess today, so you decided to just put it in a simple bun. With a towel around you, you walked back to your bed and dressed yourself before leaving the room and joining your parents for breakfast. You quickened up your pace to be in time. Your parents after all didn’t like it at all if you kept them waiting. You wondered what your butler made this time for breakfast. Your mouth was already watering at the thought of it.

 

“ Good morning.” You greeted your parents and your older brother as you entered the room, sitting down on a chair at the table. Fresh pancakes, fruits, plates with ham and cheese and different breads were neatly organized on the table, making it a beautiful display to good to be eaten. Your butler always made his best efforts with the food he served you. The smell pleasantly tickling your nose.  
Your father nodded in acknowledgement of your presence. He wasn’t a bad person, also treated you well. He just wasn’t a man of many words. Actions were more important to him and you knew that. Still a simple good morning wouldn’t be wrong sometimes. In his mind though it was enough that he was here eating with you and keeping you company. He was most of the time away on meetings so you rarely were able to spend time with him. At least in the mornings he was always here.  
“ Good morning (your name). I hope you slept well.” You nodded with a smile. “Yes mother.” She smiled back at you. Your mother however was always there for you. Going for walks with her, painting outside in the gardens, just sitting in the library reading books to one another. She always made time for you and you appreciated it greatly. Just as you were about to start eating your brother caught your attention.

“We decided to visit grandfather today.” Your older brother simply stated while not even looking at you. You stopped your movements. Your fork hovering over the strawberry you wanted to eat. You were confused now. Not because you didn’t want to visit him. It’s just, the last time you have seen him was years ago and now he wants you to visit? “Said he had a gift for you.” You looked up from the plate in front of you at your brother. “Why now? It’s not like he wanted to see us for years.” It’s not that you didn’t like your grandfather even though he has changed and not in a good way. But visiting him was rare and almost never anything good came out of those visits. You haven’t seen him in years after all. Making your best efforts of ignoring the scowl on your fathers face at your manners, you kept your gaze still on your brother who decided to not say anything further and instead to just shrug and to continue eating his share of breakfast. “You will see, it’s a surprise for you. Dress yourself in something more suitable. We will leave immediately after you are done.” Your father said. You swore you could hear a bit of disappointment and anger in his voice but you decided not to question any further. Still you were wondering about it. ‘What does he have for me? Why me? Why is a visit necessary?’ Usually when you got gifts from him he sent them. Questions over questions in your mind you didn’t dare to ask.

You placed down the fork again. Your hunger, completely gone the second they told you to visit your grandfather. It scared you. Chills ran down your spine. “ (your name)? Is something wrong sweetie? “ Your mother asked in a concerned voice. You were indeed looking like it, just sitting there frozen and not being able to move. You released a breath you didn’t notice you were holding and answered with a smile again. “ No. I’m just surprised that’s all. Don’t worry.” You quickly stood up to walk to your room again and get ready. “I will hurry up.” With that you made your way back, hurrying out of the room and running down the hallway.

 

///Your parents POV ///

 

“I don’t think she wants to.” Your mother stated plainly, concern still in her voice. “I agree with you my dearest. If you allow me to be honest I wouldn’t want to either but it is necessary.” She leaned back in her chair, her hands folded in her lap. “I know but isn’t it to harsh for her I mean…”

Your father silenced her with a reassuring smile. “It will strengthen the hold Niflheim has on Tenebrae. The prince too shall be quiet handsome. She will get used to it. We did too.” Your mother just nodded. “You are right. But if he does anything that could hurt my sweet baby I will kill him personally.” A rare laugh escaped from his lips from your mothers words. “I believe you my darling. I believe you.”

 

/// Your parents POV end///

 

You never liked this place. Zegnautus Keep. It was full of machinery, it looked dark and cold. Gralea itself however was quite beautiful in your eyes. You longed to walk down its lively streets, just explore the city, going window shopping and have a drink at a bar once. You wondered about the restaurants and their different kinds of food. Maybe you were even able to make some friends there and hang out with them somewhere in the city. You wanted to explore it so bad you couldn’t help but feel trapped by your royal status. You weren’t allowed outside, you weren’t allowed to be alone except for when you were in your room and even then someone was standing guard just outside of your door. You started to hate it but you could do nothing other than just to accept your life as it is. No, you didn’t want to be the precious little princess, you didn’t want to be treated like you were made out of glass. Everything was to dangerous for you and should someone look at you in the wrong way even though that someone wouldn’t have any wrong thoughts, someone made sure that person would never be seen again. You wished often enough to be a man like your brother, strong and independent, free to go and do as he wished as long as it didn’t made the family look bad. You were jealous. Who wouldn’t be, considering your golden cage.

So you decided to finally escape. In a keep, full of soldiers and guards. Probably not your best idea but it was worth a try. You could still talk your way out of it with the sentence you just got lost and you didn’t find your way back, adding an apology and that would be it. No punishment would await you and you could just add it as a failed attempt to your list.

 

You turned to your mother. “I need to use a restroom.” You whispered over to her. She nodded and pointed to a guard to escort you. With a thanking nod you followed the guy in front of you. Well not exactly guy in living person more like machine who is intelligent. For the whole way you planned your escape, but after a minute of walking you decided to do things spontaneously, so you just continued walking with a smile on your face.

 

As soon as you arrived at the door your ‘plan’ started. You walked in and breathed for a few seconds to calm yourself. What could possibly go wrong? Well a lot of things actually, but you had to try. You let out a scream, hoping to just alert the guard who escorted you. Not even a second later he stormed in, weapon drawn, ready to shoot whatever was threatening you. As soon as he was in you ran out closing the door behind you and destroying the card reader beside the door, hoping to emergency lock it, and so you started running. No it definitely wasn’t the best idea but well it seemed to work, for now at least. You made your way through the maze the hallways created. Sneaking around them and running short passages like your life depended on it. You just hoped that they wouldn’t notice to fast that you were gone, unrealistic thought though, you had five minutes before they will notice. At least you hoped it would be five minutes. The hallways all looked the same, the doors all looked the same, it all looked the same and it didn’t take you long to actually get lost. So much for an escape. You would need a map around here, at least something to help you navigate your way outside. As you heard footsteps you rushed into the next room you saw, not wanting to be seen by patrolling guards and hoping that the room you went into was actually empty of any living being, or machines. You still faced the door you closed in front of you. You didn’t dare to move and turn around in fear someone would be standing behind you. After a minute of total silence and your breathing being calm again, you glanced over your shoulder to check out the room just to see heterochromatic eyes staring back at you from behind a desk.

Your heart dropped. No, just no. That couldn’t be happening, well of course it would but you still hoped otherwise. At this moment you knew you fu**** up. At this exact moment you lost all of your believe in miracles and told the gods to scr*w themselves. Not very ladylike thinking things like that but in your eyes an understandable reaction. Your cheeks heated up after ridding itself of all color first, in the beginning going white, now being red like a tomato. If you wouldn’t know better you would be sure to be a chameleon.  
The man in front of you stood up. He probably was of high status here considering the white uniform he was wearing. He still looked rather young for his possible rank. His silvery blonde hair, combed back to not get in the way and well….a resting bitch face as you could call it. And to top all of it, his height was pretty intimidating. He was towering above you.

Your gaze went from his silky soft looking hair to his face, down to his uniform and finally resting at the magitek arm replacing his left arm. It scared you slightly but the purple markings did look beautiful. You wanted to explain, but no words came out. First you failed to escape, now you failed to explain yourself. Gods you were in serious trouble. You didn’t dare to look into his eyes so you kept your gaze on the ground, shifting uncomfortably on your feet.

“I asked you a question. Answer.” You didn’t even notice until now that he had said something and you had to admit that the sound of his voice seemed familiar, but you didn’t have any time to place it. You jumped slightly and looked up again, straight into his eyes. Big mistake. You felt like you were drowning and loosing yourself in them. The colors mesmerized you. The longer you just stood there staring at him with your mouth open, the more uncomfortable he seemed to get. Well, it wasn’t very nice just staring at someone, so you forced yourself to stay calm and tried to speak once more. Your plan failed already so at this moment your plan changed into try not to get killed and get back to your parents.

 

“I…I got lost.” Really? You didn’t have anything better than that?  
“Lost.” He repeated. He seemed to get frustrated. Good job (your name). Lets try this again. “Yes lost. I was on my way to my grandfather. So considering my status and my grandfather probably already being worried, escort me to him.” You didn’t want the simple request to come out that way. At least not that commanding. That just wasn’t the person you wanted to be. Usually you were nicer. You could already see him getting annoyed and angry with you.  
“I…mean, please. Would you be so kind? I didn’t want to be mean or force you.” You tried to appear confident, still you offered him an apologetic look. He didn’t answer just continued looking at you. For a split second you could swear you saw his gaze soften a bit. You weren’t sure if your mind was playing tricks on you, maybe, maybe not. Who knows?  
“ I’m sure that my parents will look for me though, as will my grandfather but, well I don’t want to cause any more trouble than I already did.”

The man in front of you walked past you to the door. “Are you coming or what? I don’t have all day. I should already be at a meeting.” Quickly you turned around and followed him out.

“Where do you need to go?” You smiled at him. “Take me to the highest point in Zegnautus. Please.” He nodded and walked with you to the elevator. The way there was rather quiet, but not in an uncomfortable way. At least for you. You enjoyed the silence, not needing to talk. You wouldn’t have known what to say anyway. You walked beside him, sometimes stealing a glance at him. He did look handsome. If it weren’t for you status you would have tried to know him better. But that was wishful thinking in your eyes. Once you talked with your grandfather you would go home again. Confined behind walls, your home a golden cage. The more you thought about it the more your eyes changed. Sadness reflected in them. You always were an emotional person. It was hard for you not to show emotion. Well from your overall appearance you could change if you really wanted to. You learned it after all. Hiding your emotions with posture, the way your voice sounded like, but they were always present in your eyes.

Once you stepped into the elevator the silence started to suffocate you. It became to much for you, you needed to speak or else your mind wouldn’t stop screaming. You wanted to be free, you wanted to go where you please, you wanted to just be yourself so desperately. So for one time you broke the rules. Not caring about the consequences and just try.

 “Thank you again. For helping me.” You broke the silence, hoping for at least a bit of small talk. He nodded. Well. It was an answer somehow too.

“I wouldn’t have known what to do without you, probably still being lost and get punished for it.” Silence. You glanced over to him, he was still standing there waiting for the elevator to reach its destination. You bit your lower lip, it couldn’t be that hard to get him talking. Slightly frustrated you shifted from one foot on the other.

“ I don’t think I got your name…” you started again, another try to at least get him talking a bit.

“Ravus.” You nearly couldn’t believe he actually answered you. “Nox Fleuret.” He added. You tried to place the name and as you did your eyes widened and you felt way more stiff. “The brother of the oracle…” You whispered, just now realizing the extent of the situation and what it meant. You could have slapped yourself. You were just standing there in shock not knowing what to do, probably looking like a stiff chicken and all of the comfortable talk you had before vanished in a second. You were embarrassed now. You should have known. Your father talked about it a few times. You should know the high ranking leaders in the imperial army. And again you just wanted to slap yourself. After calming down for a bit you thought about introducing yourself too, considering it would have been rude not to, but as soon as you wanted to start the elevator doors opened again and you thought about escaping once more.

 

Your eyes met the gaze of your parents, they looked pretty disappointed and you felt really small all of a sudden. “I’m sorry I got lost on my way back. It won’t happen again.” Your mother walked over to you. “We were worried. Something could have happened to you.” You sighed. “I’m sorry mother.” You apologized again before walking a bit further to not keep your grandfather waiting even longer. You noticed Ravus walking to the others bowing before the emperor before standing beside the others.  
On the sides you saw a few men standing there. One of them looked like he was still a child. Loqi Tummelt. Your brother said he was a good friend of his. A little rage ball he told you. The old geezer must be Verstael Besithia, with Caligo Ulldor beside him. Those you could remember but not the high commander. Again, a slap would have been nice. You noticed the tall man with auburn purple hair standing right beside your grandfather. Ardyn Izunia, the chancellor. His amber eyes looked rather sinister, sending unpleasant shivers down your spine. Of course he would be here too. You tried to look somewhere else, these eyes of his haunting you and you settled your look on your grandfather.

Time wasn’t kind to him. He looked somehow tired but still intimidating and strong. The last time you saw him you could swear he looked a lot healthier and kinder too. Nervous you walked up to him and hoped for the best.

“Ah, my dear (your name). I haven’t seen you in such a long time.”

Your grandfather spoke. “You have grown to be a really beautiful woman.” You curtsied before him, thanking him for his kind words. You didn’t know anything else to respond, you didn’t want to come off rude. At least not now. You didn’t completely trust him anymore. You heard what he did and you definitely weren’t a fan of it.

“My dear, don’t. You are family, others should bow to you.” You stood straight again, and started a little experiment. Probably not the best situation to do so but you couldn’t help yourself, or your inner child. You needed to knew if he was really still himself. You disregarded any respect for anything and just ran up to him to pull him into a hug. A big smile appeared on your face. You didn’t do that since your were 10 years old, the last time you actually saw him in person and the last time you visited him. Looks of shock were present in the room. Did you really just hugged the emperor in front of everyone like it was no big deal, no respect no anything? “(your name)! That is no way to behave!” You parents started to scold you but were quickly silenced by a raised hand of the old man. “I missed you too my sweet little angel.” The others still couldn’t get out of their shock. Iedolas Aldercapt, had a most beautiful grand daughter. She didn’t seem to have any form of respect for him being a powerful man and that old geezer just seemed genuinely happy. If someone would have told them they would have laughed about it, regarding it as a rumor and joking about the matter. Seeing it however was a different story. Ravus still looked all the same, his face didn’t change one bit. He too was in shock but he didn’t show it, not even slightly. Still unreadable but unprepared for what came next.

“I have a gift for you my dear. I really do hope you like it.” Curiously you looked at him. “A gift? I remember my brother telling me so. I wonder what it is that you get me this time. I really did enjoy your last presents.”

He gave you a smile patting your head gently.

“I want to gift you a beautiful place. Tenebrae shall be yours to control and rule.”

Heterochromatic eyes widened slightly. He wanted to protest. He did everything he could to keep his face emotionless, but it got harder every passing second. His home, his people, his sister in the hands of that young woman he didn’t even know. His hands clenched into fists to at least regain some control over himself. No he didn’t want this. Tenebrae was allowed to stay by itself as long as he swore himself to the emperor. As long as he did that, his home should have been free. He felt his world break into small pieces, shattering under the words of the old man. The next words of the cruel leader broke him completely.

“And I shall gift you its fallen “prince”. Your smile faltered. “I….It’s very generous of you but I don’t…” Your grandfather silenced you. “No refunds my dear. It’s already decided.” You felt uncomfortable. Your head started to hurt and your ears started ringing. You felt lightheaded and stumbled to your feet, forcing your body back into control. ‘NO!’ you shouted in your mind. You wanted to refuse but no words came out as you opened your mouth to speak. You didn’t want THIS. You thought about getting another pet, another book about old mysteries, nice dresses. Anything but this. A new home away from your family, being married to a stranger you didn’t even know. You felt tears starting to form but tried your hardest not to cry in front of everyone. You wanted to be free yes, but not like this. You wanted to see other places, but not like this. You felt yourself going from one golden cage into another.

 

As for the fallen prince, he only had one thought. **Ardyn!**

 


End file.
